Rainy Days

Be practical, I was told 

A long life lies ahead that 

That needs money, security, a solid foundation 

No time to dance, no time to play

All of this won’t give you anything for the rainy day 

Sigh, oh sigh - these rainy days

When all I want to do is dance and play 

Splash the water with my feet 

And wet my chappals and splutter 

The muddy muck  from the urban river 

Onto your clean dry white canvas 

Does growing up mean I have to watch 

Little children from my window 

While I drink tea and eat the bhajiya 

And they live and jump, completely free

As the raindrops wet their little faces 

And light their hearts with such glee 

Oh what is this so called practicality 

When I was born to live completely free

Free from the bondages of what Ive been told 

Of the mirrors of the past and the dreams of a future

So secure that I can’t break past

The tight  ropes that tie me to this cast 

This mould of who I’m supposed to be

Oh when, when, can I just be me 

This rain, when it comes down in its glory 

Brightening up my sunniest days 

With pregnant clouds, thunder and deep, dark skies 

Giving life to every sentient being 

I leave my comfort - I come to dance with thee

Set me free, set me free

The Grand Finale

I want a new song, I said 

What kind, He asked 

One that I don’t have to sing all alone 

Where the range is limited by me

Where the sound is all mine 

Where the wave reaches its end 

And meets no one 

Where is the fun in that?

Wasn’t life meant to be a dance 

Of two 

A duet 

A jugalbandi 

I had always been told that was the final concert 

And yet I was never prepared for either 

Not a path of two, nor a life of one 

Was never taught to string in harmony

So I just sang alone

I’ve practiced and practiced

And perfected my performance 

I’ve learnt to be patient 

To hum in the back 

To not ask for the lead 

Or be too loud 

Can I now have the prestigious reward 

Of being tied to another 

Forever?

This is the renaissance 

The old melodies are played in halls 

Of haunted corridors and creaking floors 

Raise your voice 

And stand up tall 

Push yourself higher 

Till the sharp alto breaks snaps the cord of condition 

Push yourself harder

Till your own baritone resonates in your depths 

Embody them all

For at the end of the aria 

The song fades into the darkness 

And as you stand there 

Taking a bow 

And the lights go off

There is no other 

The SisterHood

I may not have the words to comfort you

As you bleed tears of pain 
I may not be there to hold you 
In a tight embrace and offer you strength 
I may not be able to help you 
Stand up when you’re feeling down 
And I may never be able to understand 
What you’re going through 
And how life tests you every day 
As you smile through your troubles 
And wade through the muck
On this journey we must all take alone 

But I’ll be here for you 
In a sacred circle 
Holding space 
Offering you with open arms 
A home to rest, to recuperate 
To share what you hold within 
Your joy, your sorrow, your gift 
To speak the words that may not be allowed 
To be spoken in the world out loud
I will listen, I will acknowledge 
I will laugh and I will cry
With you, my sister 
Till we heal from within, and without 
In this Sacred circle we are forever bound 

Alive

 

You could be alive, yet dead inside

Your coffers could be filled with the rarest of them gems

And yet your heart, as empty as them pens

With no ink to write another story

 Your life could be surrounded by people of name

Your home filled with the whose who of fame

Yet your heart could not have one it could call

To share your happiness, your sadness, your rise, your fall

You could be alive, yet dead inside

You could wake up, and yet never rise

To embrace life, to live it for each moment

Open your eyes, your soul awaits

Not for you to watch the movies others make

To be moved by their tales of adventure

But to write your own, to traverse the unknown 

To walk up the mountain that seems too high

To follow your heart - sing your own song

Break bread with strangers, sit by a fire as you stay warm

This is the heat that keeps Spirit moving on…

You could be alive, yet dead inside

If you don’t wake up, and finally rise. 

Silence

My body needs to rest

My soul needs to heal

To step away from the humdrum

Into a quiet retreat

Get some quiet, they say

Some get their peace there

Some feel haunted 

Like the walls are closing in 

I want some quiet too

To be alone with myself 

The sounds of the woods

The silence of the trees

The silence of the ocean

My soul feels beckoned to lie in

I need the silence of the underwater

Not the silence of loneliness

Not all silence is golden

There is a taste to the quiet

Some silence brings joy

Some pain

 

Out comes the grief, sadness, and shame

Memories, dreams, everything insane

Then comes a moment of zero thought

From there I can, begin again

Ready

Standing here 

I see the valley below

The hill behind me

And I wonder

How it came to be

That I climbed up this slope

And didn't even know

When you held my hand

And took over...

I'm ready to plunge

Straight down below 

Into the depth 

Into the hole

I'm ready to go 

I look up at the sky

And see the sun shinning

Never misses a day 

To tell me you're around

Never misses a morning
To spread your light 

Until the stars glitter with joy 

Bringing the sweet night 

I'm ready to to fly 

Into the height

And soar up above 

Feel your might 

I'm ready to soar 

I look in my heart

And see you inside 

I feel your sweet love

My spirit rejoice 

There's not another moment

Of loneliness now

No fear, no pain 

No sorrow around 

I'm ready to love 

Baba.. So ready to love 

Give myself to you

Until we become one 

I'm so ready to love

I'm Ready to love... again 

Life of Light

It's Diwali 

It's my turn 

To live my purpose 

To be lit 

To light 

And then fade away into the darkness 

I am but a diya

As the sun rises 

I become more and more insignificant 

Lost in the brightness 

Of life and it's bounty 

A mere speck

Unnoticed 

Indistinguishable 

As time turns a soft corner 

And the night falls upon us

When the mighty Light leaves us to find our own path 

And souls come searching 

Lost 

Confused 

Unable to discern the shadows

Snake like ropes that lay traps 

Knocking them down 

Making them fall

Into the deception of their own minds 

I rejoice my birth into these dark times 

For now I can be seen from afar 

By many a traveller along his journey 

Bringing hope, light and warmth 

Unveiling what lurks behind the shadows

Dispelling all lies 

To be just a diya 

And the bringer of light 

Into this age of drudgery 

I smile at my might 

A Sign

Give me a sign

Show me something 

While I despair 

Not knowing how to make sense of things 

How to move forward 

Where I'm heading 

If anywhere at all

Where I'm meant to be

If somewhere, after all

Let me know that you're watching 

Give me just a clue

Make a sound that I can hear

Even though I may not always listen 

A way to break away from this roundabout

Into a possible direction 

Head closer to you 

Flow into your bounty 

Through the never ending sands 

That I walk in now 

No map, no route - 

Make the sun rise 

Shine into my eyes this morning 

So I can find East

Point out West from where it sets

Arms stretched I make head into North 

I see the star 

Everyday 

Walking before me

The moon by my side 

I still don't notice that these are the signs 

Rays of hope come into my life 

Every morning 

I only see the alarm clock tick by

Snooze for just ten more minutes... 

As I lay at night I draw my blinds 

Oblivious to the ever present bright North light 

I just don't have a clue 

Because I wasn't able to find - 

You - 

In everything from morn to night 

The Journey

When I left home yesterday 

I was incomplete 

Not because I had left something behind 

But I knew that something was just missing 

I just hadn't uncovered yet 

Parts of me that existed 

Didn't know who I really was 

Or how to even define 

What really went on inside of me 

What was going on in my mind 

Then I went down this journey 

Looking deep inside 

Down some steps, through some doors 

Till I reached a point 

Where was a storm dark and deep 

Raging turmoil and turbulence too

And as it rose to play the crescendo 

A stillness suddenly came through 

Into it I stepped with some apprehension

Letting go of my own hand

I plunged into the darkness - I felt myself fall 

Only to be saved by love and joy 

Held safe by Truth and bliss 

I let go of all I knew before 

Feeling my whole being expand 

Into the vastness of the universe 

And then came the Big Bang 

From the center of this boundless being 

As if a new day dawned 

Made out of hope, shaped by grace 

A new me was born 

Dancing to the tune of my own music 

My heart jumped a beat 

As I skipped down the road back home 

I knew I was whole, my journey complete!

In You I Have Found...

This poem was written on Guru Purnima and while I truly thank all my gurus, this one is dedicated to Rukhs, my reiki teacher. With love.

In You I have found....

.. My direction
For I was going  no where
And you showed me a way
You still hold my hand
And help me to stay
On a Path of love
Of grace and of joy
On a road less travelled
And you tell me why

... Myself
For I didn't know who I was
When I first came to you
Lost and confused
Unable to think too
You taught me to love myself
You showed me how
You told me I could grow wings and fly
You still make me push and plough

... My faith
For I didn't have anything to believe in
At best I was agnostic
In only a few moments of your touch
The world became fantastic
Surrounded by divinity in your presence
I found myself in touch with god
You may only be the bamboo if you insist
You're actually His lightning rod

... My teacher
For I was looking for a guru
Not just for a healing or for Bach
In you I found so much more
While only doing reiki for a lark
An ocean  of compassion and patience
For questions, tears, tales and talk
A guide, a friend, a teacher, a mentor,
An example of love above it all

What the flowers taught me

One Sunday morning while walking the street
I bought myself a few petals and leaves
Gorgeous sun struck flowers in full bloom
Pretty pink and purple and yellow
Repotted, decorated, watered and pruned
Placed them nicely along the sides of my room

A few days went by and the the bloom withered
I hovered constantly to look for the new
Making sure they're more flowers waiting to blossom
And it's not my home from which they withdrew
And they bloomed, but not as I hoped
And sure enough with wither I barely coped

Why would they not be glorious and flourish
What it that they needed more
To line my room with their beauty
Almost as if it were they're duty
Why would they blacken and die
Wrinkle, crinkle, fallen they lie...

Just watching them live their natural cycle
Teaches you how ephemeral life really is
And that it's forever if you really believe
It's not for death that you need to grieve
I watched them come and go each day
I couldn't make them forever stay

Trust in the cycles of the universe
For this was exactly the way it was meant to be
Timed perfect, according to plan
When the sun rose, when the day began
I could want more flowers, but they didn't come
Until they were ready, pink and purple ones

Bloom each day as if it were your last
Bring joy and happiness to each one you meet
You don't need words to shine your grace
It shows on each petal, each flower, each face
Look for the color amidst the twinnings
There in lies your silver lining!

The Five Life Essentials to Live By

To live each day to its fullest

To take life by it's horns 

To sleep each night with a content heart 

After a day of work has gone 

With peace as if it were the very end 

And knowing tomorrow it starts again... 

When you think about living each day of your life to the very fullest, look out for a way to imbibe these five essential factors into your life. 

1. Physical health 

One can't ever stress enough on how important it is to be physically healthy, fit and strong. Not only to look good, to feel attractive, to love yourself, but this body was given to you with the purpose of staying with you through this lifetime. Catering to it's true nature and needs is one of the core responsibilities and the least we owe ourselves. None of the other parts of your life - people, work, money - will matter of you don't love, nourish and care for your physical self. 

2. Mental and emotional health 

Can't stress on this enough! With more than enough proof that physical health depends on the state of emotions, taking care of this aspect of our personalities becomes a priority. Not just the new age management of stress, but a constant dose of care for the emotional well being - with lots of self love, loving and harmonious relationships, the presence of peace and joy in all aspects of life. You can't avoid conflict, but you can spend this lifetime learning to deal with conflict with the greatest possible wisdom. 

Your mental well being and stimulation keeps you young and alive. Explore, question and retain that child like curiosity you were born with. Make clear decisions and stick with them. Play, engage, create. Balance the two sides of your brain - create and hone your intuition, while keeping logic and reasoning alive. 

3. A purpose 

Without a single minded purpose, you can spend your life walking aimlessly through a fog. This doesn't mean that you will know what you were meant to do the day you were born. A sense of purpose gives you the will to live, and something to wake up for every morning. 

This doesn't mean that if you don't know your purpose, your life is wasted! It simply means that at this point finding the purpose of your life is your everyday purpose. 

You were not created to wake up, sleep and die. You were created to be awesome. You were created to make a difference. Look out for what this purpose is. And follow it through. Learn what life has to teach you while you go about living each day true to your purpose. 

4. Faith 

This is the hardest one to explain. But whether you choose for it to be in God, Source, Light or the Universe, you know that there is a bigger plan at play. Trust implicitly in this plan. Surrender all the requirements of your ego, the need for the outcome of your life to be a certain way. Have faith not only in this source of universal love, but also in yourself, knowing that you live every day of your life fully to the best possible way you know and that you are being taken care of. Even on your bad days. Especially on your bad days. 

5. Love

It seems to make sense that if you followed through with the first four points, love would naturally be part of your life. But this is not the kind of love that you feel for yourself and that makes you care and nourish your body and mind. It's not the love that you feel for friends and family, or for your pets. 

This is the love we come here to learn, that makes us disintegrate all our differences and know that at the beginning and the end of it all we are but one. It's filled with compassion. It's layered with wisdom. It's the love that stays forever, unaffected and unmoved by life itself. Learn to imbibe this love into everything you do and share it with everyone you meet. It's your way to spread light. 

Life, and life

If only life were that simple
And I didn't have to endure
My lessons, my karma,
If only I was sure
That this round of working
On myself and my issues
Would peel the layers one last time
Finishing up my last box of tissues
Feeling the pain and healing the core
Would ease it all away
Ah so naive my thought was
So easily I could sway

It never ends, does it
It's not really like an onion peel
It's a spiral that holds u in the center
With each turn, another one u see
It's a lifelong worths of lessons to be learnt
A lifetimes worth of self polishing
And when this round is done and you think it's over
All you're doing is waiting
For another opportunity to come one more time
To be born, to live, to die, to create another rhyme.

Mirror Mirror

Mirror mirror on the wall
Who is the fairest of them all?

A little girl eager to please
Making good grades with ease

A sullen teenager working hard
Eating aways at loads of lard

A young heart with a sweet crush
For the first time who feels the love rush

An angry young woman who sees her dad
Abuse his health, her mother and make her sad

A girl who loves her little furry pet
Who hears her out and understands things that no one else can get

A teenager on the brink of losing her mind
Leaves the country for peace and love to find

A woman who sits and retrospects
Staring at life from a ship forever anchored and decked

Mirror mirror on the wall,
Who am I, from these all?

And the wise mirror with great compassion replies
Just like life, to it's disciples' wails and cries

You are but a mix of the shadows you cast
Each one a teacher, not forever to last

Turn Into love and look out for light
As each shadow merges into you, making you bright

You are a being of this unmasked glory
Write a new song, start a new story!