Rainy Days

Be practical, I was told 

A long life lies ahead that 

That needs money, security, a solid foundation 

No time to dance, no time to play

All of this won’t give you anything for the rainy day 

Sigh, oh sigh - these rainy days

When all I want to do is dance and play 

Splash the water with my feet 

And wet my chappals and splutter 

The muddy muck  from the urban river 

Onto your clean dry white canvas 

Does growing up mean I have to watch 

Little children from my window 

While I drink tea and eat the bhajiya 

And they live and jump, completely free

As the raindrops wet their little faces 

And light their hearts with such glee 

Oh what is this so called practicality 

When I was born to live completely free

Free from the bondages of what Ive been told 

Of the mirrors of the past and the dreams of a future

So secure that I can’t break past

The tight  ropes that tie me to this cast 

This mould of who I’m supposed to be

Oh when, when, can I just be me 

This rain, when it comes down in its glory 

Brightening up my sunniest days 

With pregnant clouds, thunder and deep, dark skies 

Giving life to every sentient being 

I leave my comfort - I come to dance with thee

Set me free, set me free

Non-Sense

You don’t understand, for you cannot see

The world beyond the ordinary 

Of fairies, of pixies, of devas in trees

Of the deep jungles that hold the mysteries 

Of the crystal fountains that give breath and life 

You don’t understand, for you cannot hear 

The HAM of the universe 

Of shiv, of parvati 

Of the heart beating and pulsating 

As they dance to the rhythm of the songs beyond 

You don’t understand, for you cannot feel 

The winds speaking as they touch your body

The vibration of life making its way thru every fabric of creation 

Yet you breathe, ye know not what 

You don’t understand, for you cannot smell 

The sweet fragrance of her blessings 

His omnipotent Presence 

In each flower that beholds His unique imprint 

You don’t understand, and you never will 

Until you close your eyes and mind 

And open your heart to that what lies 

Beyond this world of struggle and strife 

There in the midst of the field of chaos

Magick awaits; some call it theos 

You wear your straight jacket, and ease it’s crease 

And ignore the wave of the sweet breeze 

You call me crazy, strange at best 

As I sit down and want to rest 

Lost in the world of imagination 

Of magick and of creation 

Of fairies and pixies and those little playful elves 

Alive

 

You could be alive, yet dead inside

Your coffers could be filled with the rarest of them gems

And yet your heart, as empty as them pens

With no ink to write another story

 Your life could be surrounded by people of name

Your home filled with the whose who of fame

Yet your heart could not have one it could call

To share your happiness, your sadness, your rise, your fall

You could be alive, yet dead inside

You could wake up, and yet never rise

To embrace life, to live it for each moment

Open your eyes, your soul awaits

Not for you to watch the movies others make

To be moved by their tales of adventure

But to write your own, to traverse the unknown 

To walk up the mountain that seems too high

To follow your heart - sing your own song

Break bread with strangers, sit by a fire as you stay warm

This is the heat that keeps Spirit moving on…

You could be alive, yet dead inside

If you don’t wake up, and finally rise. 

Ready

Standing here 

I see the valley below

The hill behind me

And I wonder

How it came to be

That I climbed up this slope

And didn't even know

When you held my hand

And took over...

I'm ready to plunge

Straight down below 

Into the depth 

Into the hole

I'm ready to go 

I look up at the sky

And see the sun shinning

Never misses a day 

To tell me you're around

Never misses a morning
To spread your light 

Until the stars glitter with joy 

Bringing the sweet night 

I'm ready to to fly 

Into the height

And soar up above 

Feel your might 

I'm ready to soar 

I look in my heart

And see you inside 

I feel your sweet love

My spirit rejoice 

There's not another moment

Of loneliness now

No fear, no pain 

No sorrow around 

I'm ready to love 

Baba.. So ready to love 

Give myself to you

Until we become one 

I'm so ready to love

I'm Ready to love... again 

Guilt: Wrapped or Warped?

One of the most effective ways to touch upon an emotional chord and make someone do something they don't really want to, but for some reason feel they should, is the universal anti - good feeling of guilt. In my mind, in the same way people say fear is the opposite of love, guilt is the opposite of happiness. 

You'll often have people tell you to not allow other people to make you feel bad about something. Guilt is an emotional manipulation tool, imbibed into the core of people. 

Then there is that voice, where one part of your mind silently tells the other that your being a little too happy. That your being a little too self indulgent and a bad mom if you want a day away from your two year old. The voice that says that you should not buy the new iphone cause your old phone is just fine, especially since no one else in your family is getting a new one. The voice that says that you are so tired that you could fall, but you can't tell your mother in law that you'd just rather order dinner than cook it, and worse, eat it quietly watching tv in your room after a long day at work. 

At work, it's the voice that says that your boss should not be sharing your burden of work. Or the one that says that your neglecting work if you decide to be selfish and go to the gym past 8 pm, to leave things to be done the next day. 

These are simply just not acceptable things to say or do. 

Says who? 

That nagging voice in your head is you! 

No matter what people say, the feeling of being guilty only becomes real when it is powered by your own lack of self belief. 

If you truly believe in your own happiness, and the pleasures, attitudes, choices you seek that make you happy may also make you a little selfish, it ought to be ok. The next time that warped voice in your head questions your own happiness and well being, unless it's about a piece of cake, go ahead and shut it up. If you wrap yourself in guilt, you'll only realise another day that your only guilty for the joy you denied yourself. 

No one else will even know the difference.